Forgiveness.

I have thought about the day that all things went wrong many times. Each time I relive those last moments of us…. I come out with a different emotion. You see, when it all first happened…I was heartbroken. Then when I stepped back and reanalyzed everything…I simply hated you and could not believe things had gotten so bad. I let months pass and I felt hope. Hope, that I could try and make things better but every time I tried I had seemed to fail. Then I told myself to keep pushing because you fight for the things you love the most and so I did. But when you told me all these heartless things, it was then that I felt anger. I was mad because I had did everything I could and I had tried for so long that nothing seemed to change your mind. And one day I was sitting on the edge of my bed and I just let it go. I let the tears fall and it was then that I felt relief. I was relieved because it truly showed me what I did not deserve any of the things I had gone through. It was the true blessing in disguise that told me I deserved so much more. That I deserved to be loved and fought for. I let you take away months and years of my life. I gave you the satisfaction of watching me beg for you to come back. I should have had more dignity for myself. Fortunately, everything I went though taught me to finally forgive people like you. Forgive sadness, anger, hatred, hope, faith, and myself. I know how to forgive now. And one day…you might too.

 

J.Phae

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